?

Log in

Supreme Master Chief Road WarriorPoet Taffin, M.D. [entries|archive|friends|userinfo]
Supreme Master Chief Road WarriorPoet Taffin, M.D.

[ userinfo | livejournal userinfo ]
[ archive | journal archive ]

Greek History Week [Sep. 13th, 2005|12:01 am]
Supreme Master Chief Road WarriorPoet Taffin, M.D.
[Tags|]
[music |Kanye West ft. Jaime Foxx - Golddigger]



This week on The Daily Show they're doing an Evolution Schmevolution series. Not to be outdone, I have declared this week Greek History Week on Taffin's Livejournal. I've heard one black comedian ruefully question why "they" made Black History Month the shortest month of the year. Well, for the same reason I chose to devote only a week to Greek History- so we don't have to come up with so much stuff to talk about. Also, since I am starting this technically on Tuesday and I have chosen to count this "intro" as Day 1, I'll be doing even less work. If that's not a demonstration of the famed Greek intelligence, I don't know what is.

One would certainly think that I could easily scrounge up more than enough Greek history to fill up a week, considering that we spend quite a large part of our academic career studying Greek achievements in a variety of fields and glowing Greek accounts of those selfsame achievements. The problem is that despite this comprehensive exposure to Greek History, there's a lot of stuff most people don't know. Sure, everyone knows that the Ancient Greeks invented math, medicine, drama, democracy, military special forces, and gay bathhouses. But what do we know about the Modern Greeks? Not much, it turns out. Some would say that's because the Greeks stopped doing anything worth knowing about right around the time they stopped wearing togas. Well, some people would be total RACISTS then. I contend that I've forgotten more than most people know, but I still remember enough to tell you some things you don't know about Greek History this week, and if I run out of things to say, I will learn new ones, for the sole purpose of teaching them to you, my readership whose numbers dwindle almost as fast as your interest.

So tell all your friends, yes, even your real friends, the ones who have yet to be dirtied by the Internet's greasy, probing fingers, tell them all about Greek History Week on Taffin's Lifejournal, cuz it's gonna be a hot one.
link4 comments|post comment

I love craigslist [Sep. 9th, 2005|04:41 pm]
Supreme Master Chief Road WarriorPoet Taffin, M.D.
[music |Stemage - Norfair (metroidmetal.com)]

EMERGENCY! Viagra needed downtown, post-haste! I can clearly imagine the scenario, the deserate man with his flaccid member, the prescription drug dealer rushing in like an EMT saving a heart attack victim, the hooker agast, yet supportive of her client.
linkpost comment

LOL George Bush doesn't care about black people. [Sep. 3rd, 2005|12:31 am]
Supreme Master Chief Road WarriorPoet Taffin, M.D.
[music |Kanye West - Gold Digger]

Kanye West: George Bush doesn't care about black people.
Mike Myers: OMG WTF?
Chris Tucker: [dumbstruck for the first time in his life]
link4 comments|post comment

Beating the system [Aug. 30th, 2005|02:17 pm]
Supreme Master Chief Road WarriorPoet Taffin, M.D.
[mood |relievedrelieved]
[music |Avenged Sevenfold - The Art Of Subconscious Illusion]

Dear Triffin,

Congratulations! You have passed the Final Exam with a score of 80 percent.


Please keep a copy of this email as proof of completing the course should your Certificate of Completion is misplaced. Your Certificate will be faxed directly to the court.


Thank you for choosing TooLazyForTrafficSchool.com


It should be noted that 80% is the minimum passing grade.

It should also be noted that last night I was doing about 80 on the highway and a cop blew past me at 90-100.

Almost time to call the vet about picking up Rayna. All that worrying in the last post for nothing (they would have called if there was a problem with her procedure).
linkpost comment

Anesthesia (Pulling Teeth) [Aug. 30th, 2005|08:47 am]
Supreme Master Chief Road WarriorPoet Taffin, M.D.
[music |goat - Scourge of 1691]



I just dropped off Rayna at the vet for a teeth cleaning. They have to put her under for it and she's gonna be there until at least 3pm. I feel a little stressed. I know they do this stuff all the time and she'll be okay, but I've never had to leave her at the vet like this. Or put her under anesthesia. And I have to deal with the LA Traffic Court so I don't get points on my license because I didn't attend traffic school while I was in the hospital. Not sure if those heartless assholes will accept that excuse even if I get through to a human being. So today should be nothing but horrible experiences. Alright, let's go!
link5 comments|post comment

Stop talking about yourself, you self-involved asshole [Aug. 28th, 2005|02:45 am]
Supreme Master Chief Road WarriorPoet Taffin, M.D.
[music |Jimi Hendrix - Manic Depression]

Gay-ass personality memes go hereCollapse )Pretty insulting. True on some levels. I felt like I could answer 60% of the questions in opposite ways. I mean, I'm insecure sometimes and an egomaniac others. I'm the former more often than the latter, but I have an occasional outburst of pride that allows me to accomplish shit or get something started when necessary. Seriously, though, this reads like a pyschologist's private notes on a very pathetic person.
link1 comment|post comment

You won't like me when I'm angry [Aug. 27th, 2005|05:32 am]
Supreme Master Chief Road WarriorPoet Taffin, M.D.
[mood |enthralledenthralled]
[music |Avenged Sevenfold - M.I.A.]

The Hulk: Ultimate Destruction is without a doubt the most fun game I've played this year. You're the Hulk and you bash shit so satisfyingly that you'll say "awesome" in a Chris Farley voice. Think of the lauded, free-roaming Spider-man 2, only less repetetive/frustrating, more destructive, with better controls/combat, and not such a fucking goody-goody (at least you get to play as Venom a little in Ultimate Spider-man. Anyways, if you buy Hulk at Target today only (last day for the promo), you get a $10 gift card. Pretty sweet deal. A few other games are on sale and have this same offer, but I can't imagine any of them being better than the Hulk. Seriously, this shit gets my highest recommendation and I've only been playing it a few hours. It's on all three consoles, so you have no excuse not to buy it. Now go, consume!
linkpost comment

Registered Sex Offender Brian Peppers [Aug. 26th, 2005|04:49 am]
Supreme Master Chief Road WarriorPoet Taffin, M.D.
[music |Weezer - We Are All On Drugs]



Forgive me if I am behind the times, but this guy is no joke.
link11 comments|post comment

Back that shit up. [Aug. 23rd, 2005|03:32 am]
Supreme Master Chief Road WarriorPoet Taffin, M.D.
[music |Avenged Sevenfold - Bat Country]

In case you wanted to see some dudes get the shit knocked out of them by a psycho. Just in case.

Somebody scraped the side of my bumper with a cart or something the other day in the parking lot while I was in the grocery store nd didn't leave a note or anything like that. For a while afterwards, I was filled with rage and wished I could deliver a beating unto that person (I settled for punching a tree in the parking lot and then fixing the cart collection thing in the hopes people would take an extra 20 seconds to void messing up other cars). But I dunno. I don't think a jury would be too sympathetic to me busting a guy's head for messing up my car. Plus, there's always the possibility that I'd hurt myself more than him, like a guy who told me he punched a dude and ended up getting the dude's teeth stuck in his fist, which lead to an infection that almost ended in amputation. Completely putting aside the legal consequences, I just don't think it's worth fighting for the hell of it. I'm already sick of being sick and having to heal from a hospital visit. Although I guess I could get more girls by telling them I can't go out so why don't you just come over because I got hurt in some manly, absolutely necessary (in my telling) fight, rather than cuz my colon is fucked.
link4 comments|post comment

Skulls... and why Skeletor can never be gay. [Aug. 21st, 2005|01:22 am]
Supreme Master Chief Road WarriorPoet Taffin, M.D.

You may or may not be aware that I like skulls and skeletons.Collapse )

Why did I explain my fashion (non)sense as it relates to skulls in such great detail? So I could bring you this Tribute to Ray Harryhausen which somehow involves Skeletor singing YMCA in an unidentified language. I'm not in favor of anything that makes Skeletor seem gay, but after a while, I realized he kinda did it to himself and recalled that the He-Man figures were much cooler than the cartoon. I mean, this is a custom, unprouced figure and someone's idea of what Scare Glow would look like if they made him today, but you know what that figure does? It makes me want to raise [my] head and taste the courage.
link5 comments|post comment

navigation
[ viewing | 10 entries back ]
[ go | earlier/later ]